Tag Archives: Oprah

Susan Sarandon’s minimum wage example

AP_Susan_Sarandon_Sanders_12x5_1600Originally posted at American Thinker

Sixty-nine-year-old part-time actress, full-time liberal activist, and all around rich Hollywood bigmouth (she’s worth $50 million) Susan Sarandon nearly broke out crying as she introduced a man who demonizes affluent people like herself.

In northern Iowa, on the campaign trail with presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), Susan told a town hall crowd of about 1,000 that she was “feeling the Bern” because, unlike Hillary Clinton, who was for the Iraq war before she was against it, and against gay rights before she was for them, Sanders has never vacillated on either topic.

Dressed in a socialist uniform, Susan wore a newsboy hat, boots, and a lumber jacket.  After having manned the phones with Bernie’s doppelgänger, actor/comedian Larry David, at the “Night of Too Many Stars,” Susan prepared for the part to work a Bernie phone bank with scruffy millennials and old hippies, both of whom are eager to “share her wealth.”

Maybe Susan Sarandon doesn’t realize that, despite her proletarian getup, she’s among the “few” in whose hands, Bernie keeps saying, “all of the wealth rests.”

A few years ago, while talking to Oprah about her Catholic upbringing, the parochial schoolgirl said this: “I just didn’t understand why they would put babies in limbo just because they weren’t baptized… Or why they would say every other religion was bad.”

Wait!  Susan Sarandon is worried about unbaptized babies?

Sorry, but one can’t help but wonder where fiercely pro-choice Susan Sarandon believes the aborted babies she marched for the right to kill end up after being scraped out of the womb into a biohazard bag.

Either way, whatever it is Susan believes, the Louise half of Thelma and Louise has decided to exercise her right to choose by ditching girl power.  Why?  Because according to Sarandon, “gender is not what’s important.  Issues are what’s important.”

Criticizing the contender who should be indicted but probably won’t be, Susan said she prefers Sanders because she wants “a candidate who has the courage to stand to do the right thing when it is not popular.”

Not that Bernie does the right thing, either, but on that point, Susan Sarandon is somewhat correct.  Every chance she gets, Hillary escapes doing the right thing.

Speaking of Hillary Clinton, when not wearing fake cankles and accepting a huge salary for doing absolutely nothing, in addition to pacifism and concern for homosexuals, the actress wants someone in office who will solve income inequality.

Clearly, Susan is put off by Hillary’s unwillingness to take on the fight for a $15 minimum wage, saying, “That is not pragmatic; that’s just cynicism.  That’s giving up before you’ve even tried.”

Simply put, for Susan Sarandon, this time around, an old Jewish socialist with egg salad in the corner of his mouth is a better candidate for president than a Methodist grandmother with blood on her hands.

So how about Susan demonstrate her pragmatic lack of cynicism by donating 90% of her $50-million bankroll to Bernie Sanders?  Then, to drive home her staunch support of the Vermont socialist the Hollywood actress could shame Hillary Clinton by requesting a $15-per-hour salary to star in her next movie.

Barack Obama’s Funeral Favoritism

49-1dErhH.AuSt.55Originally posted at American Thinker

Despite occasional outbursts of “overwhelming grief,” what America has learned over the last six years is that Barack Obama is neither an indiscriminate tear-shedder nor is he an equal-opportunity funeral-attender.

President Obama admitted that he wept while watching his “girl” Oprah star in the film “The Butler,” and also openly sobbed while bidding adieu to campaign staffers after the 2012 election.

As for funerals, the ones he does choose to attend seem to be public statements about what he supports versus what he denounces.  Remember when just a few inches away from Michelle’s disapproving eye, Obama wiped warm salty ones away at civil rights leader Dorothy Height’s funeral?

Obama also blubbered his way through the funeral of liberal Hawaiian senator Daniel Inouye. Instead of choosing to hit the links that day, the president attended the senator’s memorial service and graced Inouye’s family with both his tears and presence.

The president did fly home to Hawaii the month after he was first elected to scatter grandmother Madelyn Dunham’s ashes in Oahu.

However, Obama’s Aunt Zeituni, the illegal immigrant who lived in a South Boston housing project, apparently wasn’t as highly esteemed in her nephew’s eyes as Granny Dunham. In lieu of making a personal appearance, the president helped pay Zeituni Onyango’s funeral expenses, sent condolences, and memorialized his Auntie while out golfing.

The president also chose golf over attending the wake of conservative anti-communism Polish president Lech Aleksander Kaczyński, who died in a plane crash in western Russia, along with his wife Maria and an entourage of Polish dignitaries.

Granted, at the time, Iceland’s Eyjafjallajökull volcano was spewing volcanic ash, but based on his track record, one would guess that if Obama were invited to attend a Polish celebrity golf tournament he wouldn’t let Eyjafjallajökull stand in the way.

Poland’s Lech Kaczyński wasn’t the only world leader’s funeral Obama neglected to attend. The president also rejected an invite to the funeral of Ronald Reagan’s beloved friend Lady Margaret Thatcher.

Wait! Obama could send Winston Churchill’s bust back to Britain, but he couldn’t send a high-ranking envoy from his administration to Thatcher’s send-off?

Why didn’t the president just dispatch funeral-favorite first lady Michelle as his personal representative?

After all, Michelle did manage to make an appearance at the funeral of a 15-year-old victim of Chicago gun violence, Hadiya Pendleton.  Prior to extending an invitation to the State of the Union address, Obama sent a handwritten note to Hadiya’s parents, Nate and Cleo, which they pinned inside their daughter’s casket.  That note was more of a touching extension of sympathy than the parents of four Americans killed in Benghazi ever received.

Barack also sent Michelle as an emissary to Maya Angelou’s funeral, where she got to share that “a young white woman from Kansas … named her daughter after Maya, and raised her son to be the first black President of the United States.”

Unlike how he treated conservatives Lech Kaczyński and “Iron Lady” Thatcher, Obama did send a prominent delegation to anti-American socialist Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chávez’s funeral when he passed away about a month prior to Thatcher.

When it comes to Barack Obama insulting the dead, the funerals of Americans are no exception.

The president chose to fly 16 hours and allowed the State Department to spend $11.5 million for Nelson Mandela’s funeral where, including the time spent taking selfies, he and the first lady spent less than 13 hours on the ground.  But for the funerals of Brian Terry, the Border Patrol agent shot dead with a “Fast and Furious” gun, and ICE agent Jaime Zapata, who was allegedly executed with a gun also provided to his killers by the Obama administration, the president was a no-show.

Most recently, a second round of golf in three days waylaid Obama on the same day that 55-year-old murdered Major General Harold J. Green, the highest-ranking military officer killed in combat in a half-century, was laid to rest.

NBC News reported:

U.S. Army Major General Harold Greene was buried today at Arlington National Cemetery with full military honors, including a caisson, two escort platoons, casket team, firing party, colors team, and a caparisoned horse. The U.S. Army band, “Pershing’s Own,” played softly as the funeral procession made its way down the long hill past the rows of simple white gravestones to bring General Greene to his final resting place.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Martha’s Vineyard, the duffer-in-chief was putt-putting around on another green.

In fairness, in a speech he gave before signing into law a bill on veterans’ healthcare, Obama did send brief condolences to Green’s family and all Gold Star families who’ve lost loved ones.  The White House’s justification for the president downplaying the general’s death was that because he was a high-ranking military official the president didn’t want to appear to be valuing one person’s life over the lives of every other American, even though he does so all the time.

But talk is cheap.  Based on which funeral he attends and which he sits out, it’s clear Obama does assign significance to the passing of some and not to others. When it comes to shedding tears and attending funerals, black civil rights leaders, left-leaning Hawaiian senators, and victims of gun violence — whose deaths further his anti-Second Amendment agenda — do have more worth when weighed against whether or not he should forego a round of golf or pay his final respects.

What’s obvious is that the president who preaches fairness is actually guilty of favoritism, especially when it comes to attending funerals.

Obama’s partiality is evident whenever a previously-scheduled golf game makes it all but impossible for him to break away, or if the deceased person is a patriot who died in the line of duty, embraces conflicting partisan views, or is a dead foreign leader whose political philosophy President Barack Obama rejects.

The Presidential Degradation of the Medal of Freedom

1004989_10151832982067336_1800900108_nOriginally posted at American Thinker

At the 2013 Presidential Medal of Freedom ceremony held in the East Room of the White House, 2009 Nobel Peace Prize winner Barack Obama chose to honor more than just a few ‘winners.’ The colorful collection was a cacophony of politically correct Democrat darlings, with a journalist, a RINO, two deceased homosexuals, a few Latinos, and an occasional black sports figure thrown in for good measure.

In addition to the eclectic array of 13 relatively benign forgers of freedom, three controversial awards also went to a race-baiting billionaire, a misogynist former president, and an abortion-supporting, man-hating women’s rights activist. 

It was three centuries ago that English Bible commentator and Presbyterian minister Matthew Henry wrote that “The wickedness of a people is great indeed when noted sinners are men renowned among them.”

Henry’s words sum up why Bill Clinton, Oprah Winfrey, and Gloria Steinem ended up being commended by the president.

As for Bill Clinton, there’s no arguing that the 42nd president of the United States is a “noted sinner.” Even still, the often-dishonorable Honorable Bill Clinton does deserve a medal. First for criticizing the current president’s handling of the Obamacare debacle, and then for allowing the guy he critiqued to approach his neck with something that could easily double as noose.

Clinton may not have realized it, but if the one doing the tying were to express his true feelings towards the honoree, the former president might have found himself in the posthumous category.

Nonetheless, dead presidents and award ceremonies aside, the problem with Bill Clinton is that he’s like a Whac-A-Mole– he pops up all over the place, and even walloping him on the head with a rubber mallet probably wouldn’t get him to stop butting in.

Curtailing Bill’s enthusiasm may be the only reason he was chosen to receive a medal.  Barack Obama may have been hoping to assuage Bubba’s unrelenting attempts to usurp attention by making him feel loved and appreciated.

Either way, since there’s no presidential distinction for lower-lip-biting, serial philandering, impeachable lying, or crooked finger-wagging, wily tomcat Slick Willy was undoubtedly decorated with the Medal of Freedom for managing to maintain a free man’s lifestyle while being connubially linked to Hillary Clinton for 38 years.

Then there’s the “renowned” Oprah Winfrey, who remained on the roster of honorees despite making racially incendiary remarks during a recent interview in Britain. 

On foreign soil, the media mogul vilified Americans when she called Obama’s political adversaries racists. Yet despite Oprah telling BBC Arts Editor Will Gompertz that generations of Americans have “marinated” in racism, she had no problem smiling in agreement while the president praised her for helping people “discover the best in [them]selves.”  

Barack Obama even declared that Oprah Winfrey is “living proof” that in a nation full of prejudiced white people, a poor, overweight black girl from Mississippi can rise “from a childhood of poverty and abuse to the pinnacle of the entertainment universe,” win 40 Emmys, and own the “distinction of being the first black female billionaire.”

Notwithstanding those and other impressive achievements, Barack Obama must have deemed Oprah watching his back medal-worthy, as well as her unshakable resolve to help a nation of racists live their “best life.”

So, taking her unmatched humanitarianism into consideration, maybe after winning a Medal of Freedom Oprah can exercise her commitment to her “grow and … be better” philosophy by having maligned former Food Network star Paula Deen cater a belated Medal of Freedom party Oprah can throw in her own honor.

One other ‘winner’ chosen to receive the highest civilian honor is that elderly icon of animosity, Gloria Steinem.  Gloria’s “wickedness” is manifested in radical feminism and abortion activism, which liberals like Barack Obama define as “women’s rights.”

Quotes like “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle” sum up the essence of who Ms. Steinem is. Also renowned for radical attire, Gloria’s most famous fashion statement was when she sported a T-shirt that announced, “I had an abortion.” 

Now, 57 years after Gloria aborted her child, she can celebrate her freedom by accessorizing her Planned Parenthood wardrobe with her big, bold, star-shaped presidential accolade that tells the world that “Having an abortion = a Medal of Freedom.”

In the end, after all is said and done, the only one missing from the day’s festivities was MSNBC Palin-basher Martin Bashir.  But even without Bashir, the Medal of Freedom is just another example of how everything from a college degree to the office of the president is now represented by grossly unexceptional people, or in this case, lying adulterers, ardent abortionists, and race baiters.

That’s why it was no surprise that lying, racist, abortion-supporting Barack Obama thought it would be commendable to take the award ceremony down to a lower-than-low level by presenting a Presidential Medal of Freedom to “noted sinners,” three of whom adhere to many of his own less-than-honorable values.

The Medal of Freedom Free-for All

presidential_medal_of_freedom

Originally posted at American Thinker

On the 50th anniversary of President Kennedy’s establishment of the Presidential Medal of Freedom, Barack Obama, the guy who’s done more to obstruct freedom than any American president in history, will be the one handing out the medals.  Having Barack Obama dispense freedom medals is on par with Hitler lighting Shabbat candles or Bill Clinton hosting a couples’ seminar on the joys of marital fidelity.

Nonetheless, according to the White House website, the purpose of the Presidential Medal of Freedom, which is the nation’s highest civilian honor, is to pay tribute to those who’ve made “meritorious contributions to the security or national interests of the United States, to world peace, or to cultural or other significant public or private endeavors.”

President Obama had this to say about the Medal of Freedom:

The Presidential Medal of Freedom goes to men and women who have dedicated their own lives to enriching ours. This year’s honorees have been blessed with extraordinary talent, but what sets them apart is their gift for sharing that talent with the world. It will be my honor to present them with a token of our nation’s gratitude.

The individuals due to receive the medal are supposedly selected by the president or recommended to him by the Distinguished Civilian Service Awards Board.  Judging from the list, it’s easy to see that when choosing the 2013 recipients, Barack Obama was guided by his own personal opinion.

This year’s group is made up of the following luminaries: liberal politicians from the left-of-left wing to the just plain old RINO left wing; one liberal journalist, plus a Berkeley-schooled psychologist; a departed Obama-supporting female astronaut and a living Jimmy Carter-supporting coal miner’s daughter; a Cuban musician; a Berkeley-schooled Mexican scientist; a black athlete; a female Democrat judge; a deceased LGBT activist; and a couple of civil-rights leaders.

Although the group consists of many standouts, three in particular have Barack Obama’s fingerprints all over them, the first being former President Bill Clinton.  If Bill Clinton deserves anything, it would be a medal for freeing the Oval Office from the confines of presidential dignity.

While Commander-in-Chief Clinton cavorted with a chubby intern, lied about it, perjured himself under oath, and was impeached, now that the “vast right-wing conspiracy” has been fully exposed, he’s one of 16 candidates for a Presidential Medal of Freedom.

Barack Obama had to be behind giving Bill Clinton a medal.  After all, what better way for the present occupant of the White House to make his sorry self look good than to give a medal to someone just as sorry?

Therefore, Bill Clinton deserves a Medal of Freedom for freeing Barack Obama from a future of indignity associated with being a God-awful president.

Then there’s feminist Gloria Steinem.  How she got on the list is a Ms-tery.  It must be because Obama respects Gloria for dedicating her life to America’s enrichment by fighting for the right to deprive children in the womb of the right to be born.

Seventy-nine-year-old Gloria proudly wears an “I had an abortion” T-shirt, openly boasting about aborting her own child who, had he or she lived, would be 57 years old today.

Ms. Steinem fondly reminisced about that abortion:

I used to sit and try and figure out how old the child would be, trying to make myself feel guilty. But I never could! … Speaking for myself, I knew it was the first time I had taken responsibility for my own life. I wasn’t going to let things happen to me. I was going to direct my life, and therefore it felt positive.

Who can argue with Obama choosing to give a medal to Steinem for being so cold, heartless, and self-serving that she makes a guy who believes in allowing babies born alive in botched abortions to die without warmth, hydration, or oxygen seem like a pillar of compassion?

Hence, Gloria Steinem deserves a Medal of Freedom for decades of freeing fetuses from the wombs of women who refuse to be deterred from directing their own self-absorbed lives.

Last but not least, we have Oprah Winfrey.  Besides being a gazillionaire and a media magnate of gargantuan proportions (shh, don’t you say it), Oprah was one of Barry’s biggest supporters in 2008.  She probably secretly credits herself for singlehandedly catapulting Barack Obama from the mean streets of Chicago into the family residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Among her many achievements, Oprah is an actress, broadcast journalist, and talk show host who, in a similar way to how Gloria Steinem’s dead baby was Gloria’s new lease on life, considered the untimely death of the newborn infant she delivered at 14 years old a “second chance.”

Oprah Winfrey deserves a Medal of Freedom, all right, but not for her varied accomplishments, nor for her outstanding ability to bring home the bacon.  Rather, she should take a medal for involuntarily freeing her false eyelashes from her eyelids during Barack Obama’s 2008 acceptance speech in INVESCO Field.

Anyone who can be so moved by Barack Obama’s “transcendent” oratory that the salty droplets gushing from her tear ducts dissolves her eyelash glue and destroys a perfectly good set of Ardell Demi Lashes deserves a medal.

Couple the eyelash episode with being identified as Oprah, which sort of resembles the name Obama, and Winfrey may very well have shown up the other 15 recipients and earned herself not one, but two Medals of Freedom.

With the award ceremony months away, there’s still time for Commissioner of Liberty Barack Obama to hand out medals to a few more freedom-lovers.

Let’s see…how about Queen of Free Birth Control Sandra Fluke, MSNBC Head Lesbian Rachel Maddow, IRS official Lois Lerner, ousted Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi, and the no-longer-closeted basketball player/newly-christened homosexual icon, Jason Collins?  Meanwhile, Barack Obama is probably trying to concoct a way to give one of those medals to his number-one choice — himself.

Contradicting Reports Cast Doubt On Whether Michelle Obama Felt ‘Alone, Frightened and Unsure’ Before DC Move

Originally posted at BIG Journalism

In the March 2009 issue of Vogue in an article entitled “Leading Lady,” editor at large André Leon Talley pays homage to Michelle Obama, who he believed was “poised to be the most transformative First Lady in history.” In the opening paragraphs of the article Talley describes Michelle Obama, two weeks prior to the Inauguration, standing in front of a window in the Hay-Adams Hotel, where the Obamas had moved so Sasha and Malia could start the spring semester at Sidwell Friends School.

It was there that the woman Talley described as a “long, lean…Alvin Ailey [dancer] in another life,” turned to her smitten admirer, pointed across the street, and asked him the question: “Do you see our new house?”

The “No-Churchgoing” Mrs. Obama told Talley that after “checking out churches to join [and] helping her kids adjust to unfamiliar surroundings,” she intended to “open up the White House again.” After implying that there had been years of exclusion, with Michelle as grand hostess, Talley looked forward to a day where “in a spirit of diversity and inclusion,” life at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue would finally become a “collective experience.”

The following month, Michelle’s BFF Oprah Winfrey interviewed the First Lady for O Magazine in an article entitled “Oprah Talks to Michelle Obama.”  In that article Oprah shared that Michelle, while contemplating what Winfrey called the “weight of history,” oftentimes said, “This is not about us.”

In that same interview, Oprah observed “Yet for all the majesty of the White House, the First Lady has already infused it with a palpable ease; her presence makes the place feel open and approachable. When we sit down to talk, she seems as relaxed as she did when I first interviewed her and her husband in their Chicago apartment in 2004.”

Now the American public comes to find out that in “The Obamas,” a new book by New York Times correspondent Jodi Kantor, the woman who Oprah said was excited about living in the White House because “if you want pie, there’s pie,” and who Talley perceived was “like the neighbor organizing a block party,” really wanted to stay in Chicago and delay moving to Washington DC.

In one section of André Leon Talley’s article, the part-time fashionista goes on and on about Michelle Obama’s sense of community and how Chicago’s South Side native exudes the impression that once in the White House,  ‘everyone is invited’ to the “ never ‘me’ and ‘mine’ and ‘some,’ but ‘we’ and ‘our’ and ‘all’ people’s house.”

If that was true, then why, according to Jodi Kantor, was Michelle so “worried about her children bumping into White House tourists during play dates?”

Admittedly, it is easy to understand the difficult transition from Chicago, which Michelle told Talley was the Obama family “Kennebunkport,” to what she soon felt was a “tough life in Washington DC.”  But, to say that the woman who had the water dyed green in the fountain on the White House lawn for St. Patrick’s Day a few weeks after moving in was “alone, frightened and unsure of what to do next” may be stretching it a bit.

When Oprah asked the first lady if she felt the glare of the fishbowl, Michelle said, “I don’t pay attention to it. There isn’t a bigger fishbowl, but I don’t own the glare.” In Jodi Kantor’s book the author differs when she claims sources told her that Mrs. Obama said, “Sometimes it becomes difficult to live in what we call a bubble.”

Which may be why, to distract attention from herself, in March of 2009 the unobtrusive Michelle stomped into the yard out back in $500 Tory Burch gardening boots; turned over 1,100 square feet of the White House lawn; and planted a low key garden that included “cilantro, tomatillos and hot peppers…red romaine, green oak leaf, butter head, red leaf and galactic lettuce… spinach, chard, collards and black kale.”

The first lady, allegedly anxious and hesitant, also included in her garden “a patch of berries…anise hyssop and Thai basil,” and acquired two beehives for honey to drizzle on exotic desserts and to add to White House Honey Ale.

One thing is for sure:  despite her angst, Michelle was never too lonely or frightened to shop for hundreds of thousands of dollars in designer clothes and accessories.  Nor was she unsure of which pair of pricey sneakers to wear when volunteering at soup kitchens.

To quell her despair, Mrs. Obama spent the first year (and every year since) soothing her confused, lonely self by subbing as a mannequin for the likes of Alexander McQueen, Maison Martin Margiela, Narciso Rodriguez, Nina Ricci, Thakoon and an endless roster of high-end designers.

In Vogue, Talley was so enamored with Michelle that he said her gaze was “akin to hearing a chord from John Coltrane’s ‘A Love Supreme.’ Or maybe Ralph Vaughan Williams’ ‘The Lark Ascending.’”  Spending time in Michelle Obama’s company right around the same time that Kantor claims she was full of fear, insecurity, and indecisiveness, André claimed he had a sense that “All [was] well and right and real.”

Well, was “all well and right and real,” or wasn’t it?  Because either way, based on which person got it right, the three opposing accounts pose a bit of a credibility problem for someone who was either lying, perceiving something incorrectly, or flat out got the story wrong.

In the “Time 2009 100” issue, Michelle Obama groupie Oprah did the honors again by poetically describing Michelle Obama: “How sweet it is that America has a First Lady who embodies the vibrancy and confidence of a seriously prepared 21st century woman. A phenomenal woman indeed.”

Comparing the statements Michelle made to Oprah and André Leon Talley during the months following the inauguration and subsequent move to the White House with Jodi Kantor’s account, either the first lady was really “alone, frightened and unsure of what to do next,” had no idea what she was saying, or she, like her phenomenal husband, is a phenomenal phony “indeed.”

Gwyneth the Goop Girl

Originally posted at BIG Hollywood

College drop-out know-it-all, do-it-all Gwyneth Paltrow is the epitome of a spoiled Hollywood liberal brat who was raised in privilege, never told no, and made to believe her every thought was brilliant. The Paltrows must have been the type of parents who handed out trophies to the losing soccer team, because daughter Gwyneth is a hopeless victim of undeserved “Good job-ism” gone wild.

An average kid with moderate talent, since her late teens, between acting, mothering, cooking, and singing, Gwyneth Paltrow has subjected America to incessant rounds of painful “No wait…let me start again,” off-tempo renditions of Für Elise followed by impromptu tap-dancing exhibitions by a grown woman who might as well be dressed in a tight pink tutu.

Gwynie (I like to call her Gwynie) is an attractive woman with the superior gift of imitating British accents.  Ms. Paltrow started her career in Hollywood when her mother, actress Blythe Danner, and her father, the late director Bruce Paltrow, together with family friend Steven Spielberg brokered a deal and got her a starring gig in the movies at 19 years of age.

An unabashed recipient of Hollywood nepotism, after winning an Academy Award for Shakespeare in Love Gwyneth was crowned the “Muse” of Miramax studios by film producer Harvey Weinstein.  Since that day, Gwyneth has been nothing short of unbearable.

Raised in Massachusetts, Gwynie moved back to Los Angeles where her career and love life with Brad Pitt took off. Paltrow traveled the world, and now speaks British-style English, French, Spanish, and a little Italian. Gwen even married a temperamental British rock star – Chris Martin of Coldplay – who she’d never have met without the benefit of a VIP backstage pass.

After adopting London as her new home, Ms. Gwyneth, in classic Madonna I’m Evita-I’m British-I’m a single mom to a couple of African kids- mode, dissed America, set up house, and practiced her fake English accent while taking children Apple and Moses to buy groceries in trendy London food shops.

Over the years the only thing more irritating than Paltrow feigning a British accent in the movie Sliding Doors was seeing her accepted as a gourmet cook. Gwyneth Paltrow even traveled with Mario Batali through Spain and lunched with Ina Garten, the “I’m cooking a fabulous dinner for Hamptons friend Gwyneth” Barefoot Contessa.

After soaking fava beans became too much of a chore, Ms. Paltrow re-focused and said “I could do that. I bet I could do that,” and decided to resuscitate her former career as a Duet singer, but not just a singer, a country singer, which right there was weird enough for a woman who spent so much of her life practicing speaking with a British accent. Nevertheless, two weeks into her revitalized singing career golden child Gwyneth was starring in the movie Country Strong.

Soon after, Paltrow showed up on the 2011 Grammy Awards singing “Forget You” with the Muppets and Cee Lo Green and vamping around in a precociously overconfident number on Glee.  Mrs. Coldplay’s routine was rivaled only by Katie Holmes embarrassing herself while torturing the nation on So You Think You can Dance.

The desire to share her varied gifts must have motivated Paltrow to go beyond her expertise in thespianism, Epicureanism, and crooning, because in addition to mastering all three, Paltrow created Goop.com, a place where a Renaissance woman could branch out, blog, and author an informative newsletter.

At Goop.com, the artiste/chef/chanteuse tells readers: “Make, Go, Get, Do, Be and See.”  The only way to describe the venture is that Goop is authored by an overindulged, self-impressed, spoiled rich kid sharing navel-gazing insights into experiences, locations, products, and ideas few people will ever encounter, let alone be able to afford.  Can anyone say “Clueless?”

Paltrow’s Oprah-style New Age views are a cacophony of beliefs similar to the Cheese Board area of Goop’s “Make” section. While Gwyneth’s channeling of Tammy Wynette, making Duck Ragu, recommending skin products from a French pharmacy, and explaining the Year of the Tiger is irritating, it is still all relatively harmless. However, her views on religion, philosophy and sexuality step out of the Christian Louboutin realm and into the downright unappreciated.

Case in point: Gwyneth recently introduced her seven year-old daughter Apple, whose name was chosen because it was “Biblical,” to the idea of lesbianism. Mom assured the tyke that her classmate, who had two Mommies, was “lucky,” after which she implied on Goop that she didn’t know the answer to the question: “What does it actually say in the bible that will cause some people to be upset by my line of thinking?”  You mean besides confusing a first grader?

I don’t buy the feigned perplexed confusion, because based on Gwyneth Paltrow’s history the query was more of a challenge than a question.  It’s likely that Paltrow has already resolved the issue and feels totally confident that, even if the Bible and God Himself doesn’t support her “line of thinking,” hers is still the right answer, because in Gwyneth Paltrow’s superior world her answer is correct simply because it’s hers.

The Obama Head Messers

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Mixed message mavens Michelle and Barack are proving they would be as unsuccessful at early childhood education as they are at politics. Although the state of American public education is abysmal, these two are compounding the issue by sending children messages that cannot reconcile from one paragraph to another within their own speeches, or more glaringly between the contradictory messages each one sends separately.  In an attempt to give confidence to the youth of America, this dynamic duo is doing nothing more than perplexing young impressionable minds.

According communication specialist, Dr. Rich Kirschner, “Mixed messages are confusing and when people are confused and things don’t get better, they become cynical polarized and angry, or they collapse into a state of silence and helplessness.”  So that explains it!

If children don’t know whether to line up, sit cross legged on the floor or have snack maybe the First Couple are partly responsible.  Michelle’s words to kids baffle when compared to the messages her husband has already conveyed.  Incongruousness reigns as Michelle blows the whistle signaling the start of playtime, while Barack announces its time to board the bus and head for home.

Case in point, Barack Obama decided it was his duty to encourage and urge American children to take education seriously on the first day of school.  Along with sharing horror stories from his youth that chronicled paternal abandonment, Obama goaded the children toward academic excellence with stories of brain tumors, poverty, AIDS, foster care, bullying and other uplifting exhortations toward success in school. In addition to his list of inspirational motivators, Obama decided to inject a giant sized dose of reality by telling children wearing Derek Jeter T-shirts and carrying Carrie Underwood lunch boxes that he,

Knows that sometimes, they get the sense from TV that they can be rich and successful without any hard work – that their ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, they’re never going to be any of those things.

After the children, still reeling from the left jab of disappointment, refocused on his speech, Obama went on to mention JK Rowling and Michael Jordan, explaining that Jordan,”…failed over and over and over again in his life. And that is why he succeeded.”  Huh?  Obama illuminated impressionable minds to the fact that failure leads to successfully accomplishing something you’ll never accomplish.

Dr. Kirschner believes sexual predators and perpetrators of domestic violence use mixed messages neither of which are applicable to the President.  However, control freaks also use mixed messages, “either consciously or unconsciously…as a way of controlling others,” which seems to be Obama’s signature style. Kirschner says, “…there are several hypnotic techniques that use mixed message to break down a person’s ability to think and take them into a hypnotic state,” an approach that apparently provided Obama  glowing returns in  the last election.

To add insult to injury, Michelle Obama sacrificially traveled to Copenhagen on the behalf of Chicago and the children and it wasn’t just to ask them to share their Danske Smakager.  She went there to pitch for the Summer Olympics coming to Chicago in 2016 and even more specifically to “bridge the gap” for Chicago’s children, whatever that means? Sports don’t seem to be a problem in the Windy City; Chicago’s children seem to be getting ample batting practice based on the news over the last few days.

Michelle’s message to the International Olympic Committee (IOC) was quite different from Barack’s school day lesson in realism.  The First Lady contradicted her husband’s message by saying it was imperative that the Olympics come to Chicago because, unlike children in Arlington, Virginia who were told, “…chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things,” the Olympics hold an important message for children and to,

Let people know that we understand that sports saves lives, that it makes dreams come true, that it creates visions in kids’ heads to make them think they can be the next David Robinson, the next Barack Obama, the next Nadia Comanici, the next Oprah Winfrey.

This in itself was not only confusing but an extremely prejudiced statement on the part of Michelle.  She discriminatorily cited  two famous basket ball stars, three African-Americans, just one white gymnast and a person who could use a couple of jogs around the track.  Besides confusing children by using Oprah as an example as to why the Olympics should come to Chicago, didn’t Barack Obama, just a few weeks ago tell the kiddies that they’d likely never be Michael Jordan, let alone David Robinson?  Now, before assembly or a fire drill we’d  like Shelley to tell us, which is it?

Kirschner says, “…mixed messages give rise to an ever increasing number of negative and difficult behaviors as people try to navigate the confused situation.”  No wonder the kids in Chicago mistook sixteen year old, honor student Derrion Albert for a gang member before beating him to death – these two Chicago representatives don’t make any sense.  And to make matters worse, they are now sending out their befuddled method of communication to the whole country and the larger world, giving the term “he said, she said” a whole new meaning.

Theoretically mixed messages have been responsible for everything from schizophrenia to substance abuse in children when parents say one thing and do another thereby sending confusing messages to offspring.  According to Australian social worker Paul Gibney,

The essential hypothesis of the double bind theory is that the victim – the person who becomes psychotically unwell – finds him or herself in a communicational matrix, in which messages contradict each other, the contradiction is not able to be communicated on and the unwell person is not able to leave the field of interaction.

And who more than young children are incapable of finding their way out of a communication matrices or able to unravel contradicting messages from individuals in authority?  Or, worse yet, who more than children are “…unable to leave the field of interaction,” especially when teachers insist they submit to an hour long speech by the President of the United States or endure an afternoon of the First Lady speaking on their behalf in Copenhagen?  Both conveying self-gratifying messages any person who desires to be psychologically healthy should avoid.

Kirshner has  advice for children and grownups alike, cautioning…

Because mixed messages give rise to an ever increasing number of negative and difficult behaviors as people try to navigate the confused situation…you can notice the confused state they trigger as an early warning sign that someone may be messing with your head.

Thus, what greater gift could America give Chicago’s children then to send head messers, Michelle and Barack back to 5046 Greenwood Avenue four years prior to the Summer Olympics?  Michelle and Barack can continue doing the excellent job they were doing before leaving Chicago “making the concerns of kids …their own.” This could be a national effort to “open the doors of the White House” and send those two crazy, mixed up Chicago kids back to the community they love before their incongruousness and confusion makes Derrion Albert’s out of all of us.

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