Tag Archives: Martha’s Vineyard

The Pink Slip President

Originally posted in BIG Government

In the abysmal economic climate America presently finds itself in, almost no one is immune from unemployment, because joblessness threatens everyone. While Barack Obama duffs around on the golf course, one can’t help but wonder if he fully grasps the fact that, thanks to his own incompetency, the potential to be dismissed from his highly sought-after job is more than a distinct possibility. Except for “saving and creating” jobs for the slew of workers needed to staff the Department of Labor’s unemployment division, Obama continues to singlehandedly undermine both the economy and job creation. Wherever he goes, crowds are waving layoff notices in lieu of the typical “Yes we can” banners Barack Obama is more used to seeing.

If America is the employer, and if polls are the equivalent of a job evaluation, Obama is definitely on probation. In fact, Obama’s discharge papers are already filled out and tacked to the White House door. Rather than respond to the threat by working toward winning the title of “Employee of the Month,” the President is doing everything one should never do when unemployment is a looming likelihood.

Knocking around on the beach when he should have forgone the down time and chosen to stay on the job, the president doesn’t seem to be concerned that within the next year he might find himself in line with unemployed Americans who are stimulating the economy by collecting  jobless benefits.

The truth is, the President interviewed and was hired to a position he had no business applying for in the first place. By electing Barack Obama as President of the United States, America might as well have asked a plumber’s apprentice to do surgery on the nation’s inner ear canal with an auger.

Nobody noticed or cared about Obama’s lack of qualifications because out of nowhere a seemingly elegant oratory genius touting “Hope and Change” showed up at the interview. Candidate Obama had all the buzzwords down pat and said all the right things the right way. The nation was so captivated, no one bothered to call his old employer, do a background check, or question his shady friends or palpable inexperience.

It’s only now that America is slowly coming to realize that Barack Obama might not have been the best choice for the job. After filling the position, one of the President’s responsibilities was to institute policies that stimulate the creation of new jobs, and he claimed to have a laser-like focus on doing just that. Yet, over the past three years, the only thing Barack Obama has successfully done is break the all time record for the number of golf games played by a sitting president.

As the economy and job market continue to deteriorate and a lock is about to be put on the door of the greatest nation in the world, Obama, while still immersed in intensive on-the-job training, has been commissioned to present and implement a plan to address unemployment and the country’s economic future.

Instead of meeting the target and throwing himself on the mercy of a nation running out of patience, the President placed America on hold and decided it was a perfect time to take a much-deserved summer break. The ultimate non-vetted employee skipped out for ten days, leaving a stunned America staring open-mouthed at an empty podium.

In a shaky job market, the last thing a person fortunate enough to have a job should do mid-discussion is push away from the conference table, point to their watch, and announce to the group, “Sorry guys, I really have to run, it’s time for my vacation.” Yet that is exactly what Barack Obama did.

With no job plan to speak of, the President chose instead to fly around on a company-funded plane, play lots of golf, munch on buttered corn and Cape Cod lobster rolls, and relax for a couple of weeks while the winds blow and the earth shakes below the nation’s feet, both literally and figuratively.

Obviously, the President is unaware or could not care less that when a person’s career is on the line, they should make an extra effort to arrive to work early, perform their job with renewed vigor and diligence, and be both accommodating and cooperative. What is perplexing is how Obama’s response to the possibility of being unemployed is the opposite of what people do when they’re worried they may be  fired.

Barack Obama’s chichi vacation may have sealed the deal and his temporary employment contract is not likely to be renewed. Obama may be enjoying family time on Martha’s Vineyard right now, but when the President returns to Washington he may be astounded to find out that the mail bin that was just sitting outside the Oval Office door last week has been placed inside and awaits him filling it with the contents of his desk.

The President acts as if he’s immune to being sent packing a la Jimmy Carter and that without ramifications he can fritter away time doing the equivalent of spending the work day with his feet up on the desk, laughing hysterically while having non-work-related discussions on the company phone.

It’s either that, or Barack isn’t worried, because after he returns from vacation he may have plans to rip up the pink slip and refuse to leave the position even after his four-year contract is up.

Fire and Driving Rain

Originally posted at BIG Government

With the way things are going for Obama he should stock up on good luck charms. Adding to the President’s economic, social and political struggles are natural phenomena that appear to trail and then come up to batter Obama on all sides.

3230145280_white_house_hit_by_lightning_on_easter_answer_1_xlargeEarlier this year, a lightning strike just missed the White House and then one did make direct contact at the president’s favorite local golf course at Andrews Air Force Base. Fortunately, the Golfer-in-Chief and his 9-iron were not on the course.

There have been flies in the East Room landing on the President’s lip and a rat in the Rose Garden stealing the show at a press conference. Now, as the Obama family prepares to head back to Blue Heron Farm, a lavish $20 million, 28.5-acre compound in Chilmark, on Martha’s Vineyard, a wall backing the farmhouse porch caught fire and required emergency attention from local firefighters.

This is the third year the Obamas will stay at Blue Heron manor.  The lush property has a pool, apple orchard, basketball court and private beach. Last year the Obamas rented the home for $50,000 a week, up from the prior year’s $35,000 a week.

It’s odd that the President and his family would choose Chilmark, named the most expensive small town in all of America by Business Week back in 2007.  You’d think the last group of people Obama would want to spend time with are private jet owners, snooty yachtsmen and privileged Vineyard dwellers who look for ways to avoid sharing their good fortune with others.

The secluded property is privately owned by a couple who purchased it after the previous owners died in a plane crash.  Dead former owners of property on an island famous for Chappaquiddick are creepy omens and may explain why, after paying $100,000 for two weeks worth of lodging, it seems that each year there is some sort of furlough-wrecking issue that puts a damper on the president’s vacation.

In 2010, the Obamas’ Martha’s Vineyard ice cream and golf plans were rained out. “Strong thunderstorms … lashed the island off Massachusetts …causing power outages, curtailing air transportation and forcing ferry cancellations. They also triggered traffic jams and long lines at movie theaters, restaurants and other indoor venues.”

As a result of the Nor’easter blowing around various and sundry material, “portions of Tisbury Great Pond, the salt-water lagoon fronting the first family’s vacation estate Blue Heron Farm,” was closed “due to high levels of enterococci, an indicator that the water is contaminated with fecal coliform bacteria.”

Last year the obstacles to holiday fun were moisture, dampness and putridity – this year fire threatened to be the spoiler.

With the Obama family’s scheduled arrival weeks away, a wall in the main house near the porch went up in flames.  Chilmark fire Chief David Norton said the automatic fire alarm in the farmhouse alerted two first responders who live nearby.  The dedicated firefighters quickly responded and rushed to the scene. According to Norton, the cause of the fire was not spontaneous combustion, but a faulty gas grill.

For the Obamas, not being able to take a dip in the pond is one thing, but a broken grill could be even more problematic, especially for the President winding down after the much anticipated “Let’s Pretend We’re Listening” taxpayer-funded battleground state bus tour. Anxious to be amongst the people, while on the road America’s self-sacrificial President will be subjected to the smell of diesel fuel and diner food, which could inspire him to put on his barbeque chef hat, hunker down, and rustle up some home cooking.

If he’s planning to grill up homemade chilidogs or trying to replicate a vacation rendition of Michelle’s favorite Shake Shack Burger, the last thing the President needs is to squander quality family time fanning charcoal soaked with Kingsford® lighter fluid.

What could complicate matters for the Obama family is if another Nor’easter should happen to blow through the Vineyard and the gas grill on the porch should happen to act up again, because then they’d be hesitant to dive into the sewage infested lagoon to escape the conflagration.

It remains to be seen whether Barack Obama, who has managed to apportion his time to fit in high-end fundraising and Ramadan dinners, will “cut his vacation short to deal with fiscal and economic issues.”

Maybe instead, the President will decide to  grab a rabbit’s foot, head to Martha’s Vineyard, and seize the opportunity to finally “heal the planet” by slowing the “rising ocean” and addressing the pressing elemental issues at hand – fire, driving rain, and free floating fecal coliform bacteria.

What Next – the Potomac River Running Red with Blood?

Originally posted at American Thinker blog

In the Rose Garden, rodents attend Obama speeches. In the East Room, flies utilize the President’s upper lip as a landing strip.  Last Memorial Day Barack chose the Windy City over traditional ceremonies at Arlington National Cemetery.  As the President prepared to speak at Lincoln National Cemetery in Elwood, Illinois:

Thunderstorms had rolled in …prompting the Secret Service to pull the president from the ceremony amid fear for his safety. Obama … told the guests… that he would wait … to see if the storm would pass…it quickly worsened, turning into gusty winds and rain with frequent lightning and thunder, and the White House cancelled Obama’s appearance at the ceremony.

That same summer, just before the Obama family’s Martha’s Vineyard vacation, a fierce Nor’easter blew raw sewage in the form of fecal coliform bacteria into the lagoon bordering Blue Heron Farm.

There have been mini earthquakes rumbling beneath Washington DC, a 2011 Groundhog Day blizzard and a Washington DC stink bug scourge, all woven into the colorful tapestry presently known as the Obama presidency.

Interestingly enough aggressive acts of nature have not been limited to the continental United States. When Barack traveled to Jakarta to visit his childhood home and pay respects at the Buddhist Borobudur Temple, 600-degree volcanic ash decided to spew forth from Mount Merapi in central Java.

On Easter morning 2011, the President attended Resurrection Day services at Shiloh Baptist Church.  As the President and his family entered the sanctuary, the quartet was greeted with applause and a choir singing “Total Praise.”   Dr. Wallace Smith, the church’s pastor, reminded the congregants, “This is a place of worship,” which is exactly what appeared to be going on.

On Easter evening Obama was visited by yet another natural marvel that could either be interpreted as an evil entity taking up residence amongst company of like mind, or as Divine displeasure. Maybe the Shiloh people need to be reminded that Exodus 34:14 warns: “Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.”

After moseying on home after a clandestine attempt at private worship and after supping on a secret criticism-proof Easter meal, the Presidential residence was visited by “A storm [that] rapidly materialized in the Southern sky, and swept from the National Mall toward the White House. Instantly, there seemed to be lightning bolts dropping out of the heavens all around 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue–and the wind kicked up dramatically.”

Adding to the ever-growing list of Biblical manifestations occurring in the President’s vicinity, according to an observer, “A spectacular downpour started as the lightning built, with no preliminary drops; one moment it was dry, the next there was a gushing, blowing, massive water dump.”

One can’t help but wonder how the President interprets the natural world speaking to him, or what he perceives that message to be. Based on the creative delivery style, it’s likely that Barack Obama would rather ignore the Scripture where Jesus said: “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven,” especially since a lightning bolt fell from heaven straight into the White House.

Although the President may choose to ignore Luke 10:18, in preparation for next Easter’s visit to Shiloh Baptist it may be wise for Obama to read Job 33:14, where Job says: “For God does speak–now one way, now another–though man may not perceive it.”

By paying closer attention to God speaking through His creation, there’s still a slight chance the President could prevent the Potomac River from turning to blood and making its way down Pennsylvania Avenue.

 

Mele Kalikimaka Means ‘Don’t Go In the Water’

This is an awkward subject, but what’s with the sewage showing up wherever Obama vacations?  What are the odds that Martha’s Vineyard in Massachusetts would be polluted, and then four months later, just in time for Barry’s bodysurfing exhibition, squalid water would travel 5,000 miles to beautiful Oahu? From the looks of things, it appears sewage searches Barry out, or Barry feels at home in the company of sewage.

Either way, there is no denying Obama is kind of a barefoot nature boy.  The natural world trails the President.  In the Rose Garden – rodents, in the East Room – ginormous flies, and buzzing behind the White House – swirling swarms of bees.

In fact, in what appeared to be an effort to escape an unrelenting onslaught this past summer, the first family rented the $50,000 per week “bucolic Blue Heron Farm” in blueblood Martha’s Vineyard overlooking Tisbury Great Pond.

The Obama clan intended to splash in the saltwater pond bordering the rental property.  Unfortunately, the “Yes we can” inflatable rafts had to be put away because the lagoon was off limits “due to high levels of enterococci, an indicator that the water [was] contaminated with fecal coliform bacteria.”  In other words, Tisbury Great Pond was transformed into Tisbury Poop Pond just in time for Obama’s summer getaway.

To avoid the trots, the first family steered clear of the swimming hole. Contaminated water and a Nor’Easter forced the foursome indoors to bond while playing board games and watching in amazement out the picture window as branches whipped about amidst torrents of sludge.  Talk about idyllic.

That was the summer.  Who would have thought the Obamas would wade into the same pesky situation? For Christmas, the first family is bunking in a “luxurious rental home in a small town called Kailua, about 13 miles from Honolulu.” In fact, the accommodations for family and friends include a “trio of multimillion-dollar beachfront homes,” where local boy Obama planned to bodysurf in Hawaii’s pristine waves.

The President was delayed getting to Hawaii.  He was held over in the Washington DC lame-duck pond where Democrats successfully made a sitting duck out of America. A celebratory Obama helped pass a $1 trillion stimulus package disguised as extending tax cuts, beckoned gay soldiers out of the closet in the midst of two wars, and signed a strategic arms treaty that ultimately leaves America less safe.

After successfully mucking up the works, Obama was buoyed homeward to meet Michelle and the girls, with joy and anticipation for a very Mele Kalikimaka. However, this Christmas, more than just Mai Tais and flowery leis welcomed Barack into Oahu village in Kailua.  Reminiscent of Martha’s Vineyard, fecal bacteria was again but a few sandy steps from the restricted entrance to Obama’s private retreat.

Ironically, due to heavy rains, “the Oahu village of Kailua had been forced to release untreated sewage and agricultural runoff into Kailua Bay and the beaches around the Obamas’ beach home. County officials posted signs telling tourists to stay out of the water but many Hawaiian visitors…[plan to take]… a Christmas dip anyway.”

Let’s face it – the President is accustomed to maneuvering his way around dung. One can’t help but wonder whether Obama will brave the less-than-sterile conditions and take a Christmas plunge. Obama missed the chance in Martha’s Vineyard, but all is not lost. For Christmas Barack has yet another opportunity to exhibit outstanding leadership, by heading straight into bacteria-laden waters to demonstrate that, with him as President, swimming in sewage is something every American should know how to do.

Michelle the Menu Maven

Originally posted at American Thinker blog

The woman who’s taste-tested every flavor of ice cream from Maine to Spain is out dictating gastronomical edicts to the National Restaurant Association.  With the help of Cass Sunstein, the First Lady of BBQ has decided to “nudge” Americans towards what she thinks kids should be eating because, God knows, parents and restaurateurs haven’t a clue.

The same woman who ordered hot fudge sundaes while eating her way across the North and Southeast of America is now “plead[ing] with restaurants to take a little butter or cream out of their dishes, use low fat milk and provide apple slices or carrots as a default side dish on the kids’ menu.”  One can’t help but wonder whether Sasha would have agreed to being prodded toward carrot-flavored frozen skim milk in lieu of the “melon and raspberry” ice cream concoction Mom purchased for her on the notorious Spanish “private mother-daughter” trip.

Part time nutritionist, full time First Lady Michelle believes restaurants need to “rethink the food they offer and reformulate their menus to help combat childhood obesity.”  Wonder if Michelle felt led to speak to the chef at Stewsman’s Lobster Pound, in Bar Harbor, Maine, about revising the menu. It was at the “Pound” that Michelle and Barry scarfed cholesterol-laden crustaceans while the girls devoured baskets of shrimp, which the menu described as “locally netted …cooked up crispy with Cole slaw, French fries and tartar sauce.”

Home from Martha’s Vineyard, where the family dined at the Beach Plum Inn, Sweet Life Cafe, and State Road Restaurant, none of which is renowned for diet fare, Mrs. Obama removed her epicurean connoisseur bonnet and replaced it with a dietician/lecturer’s cap.  Speaking in collective terms, the First Lady urged restaurateurs and executives to control food choices, saying “We have to do more, we have to go farther, and we need your help to lead this effort.”

In the past, the First Lady delivered “similar messages as part of her effort to boost childhood nutrition.”  Michelle successfully browbeat the restaurant industry into believing “parents’ choices at restaurants need to be easier, and healthy options shouldn’t be buried on the menu” under the fried shrimp baskets.

Michelle not only “appealed to the industry’s creativeness to get the job done,” but put the burden on restaurants to maintain family harmony by saying, “You know what gets them to drive their poor parents crazy because they just have to have something.”  In other words, do what you have to do to make lima beans taste like Rice Krispies Treats®.

According to Michelle, restaurants such as those frequented by the first family are often thought of as the worst offenders in terms of nourishment.  Yet the Obamas trawl ice cream parlors, chocolatiers, and the Magnolia Bakery, and eagerly sample spareribs at places like 12 Bones Smokehouse in Ashville, North Carolina.

After enduring the First Lady’s harangue, submissive executives agreed to “rethink their menus” with a mind to reconfigure offerings to be even more boring than eating at home, which should do wonders for the restaurant business.

America can also say goodbye to IHOP’s famous chocolate-chip pancakes, topped with powdered sugar and whipped cream. IHOP president, Jean Birch, said her company “will soon be coming out with a new children’s menu,” which plans to propel the unwilling toward fruit as “the default side.”  Birch said the “aim is for parents not to have to argue with kids to get them to order healthier items.” Problem solved! Just remove from the Carte du jour everything except that which bears the Michelle Obama official stamp of approval.

Smashing Success

Originally posted at American Thinker Blog

The Obama vacation was a smashing success. Rested and ready Obama made an impromptu appearance in the Rose Garden sans the now famous bicycle helmet. America’s back pedaling president looked so refreshed it appeared as if New England lobster managed to erase even the telltale grays from the President’s closely cropped hair.

The reason for the press briefing was Barack’s desire to extend presidential comfort by reassuring the nation, via the press, that the team that ushered in a code blue economy remains “on top of the economic crisis.”

While vacationing, Obama proved to America that riding a miniature two-wheeler is not a life skill a 6’2″ man ever forgets.  The President also proved a 10-day break in Martha’s Vineyard does not affect an ingrained propensity to blame George W. Bush.

Stepping toward the podium, Obama dove right in.  However, due to technical difficulty, it took Obama three tries to blame Bush for the appalling economy.  Stumbling over well-planned condemning comments, even the microphone refused to broadcast Barack’s never-ending drivel.

The solemn, accusatory president began by saying that when elected he was completely unaware of the depth of America’s “economic hole,” let alone how long it would take to “climb out.” However, when in a fix, Obama appears extremely knowledgeable as to how effectively project perpetual culpability onto everyone other than himself.

Obama expressed the following opinion about the flagging economy:  “What we did know was that it took nearly a decade – to dig the hole we are in.” Then the President gave himself eight years of economic leeway following the “dig the hole” comment with an “even longer to dig our way out.”

After the sound system issues, garbled statements and flyover airplane interference ceased, the President continued blaming G.W. and then segued directly into pointing the finger at Senate Republicans.  Never once did Obama acknowledge any personal culpability for being completely and hopelessly clueless.

Maybe someone should have raised their hand and reminded Obama that during the first six years of Bush’s tenure the economy was booming.  It was the last two years, after a national referendum on Iraq, that Democrats took over both houses and the economy began to falter. Adding Obama’s liberal-socialistic policies to the already ailing economy turned a benign common cold into a case of full-blown pneumonia.

Obama claimed Republicans are now in the process of obstructing an “initiative [he] proposed to cut taxes that will encourage small businesses to hire and expand, as well as a $30 billion small business lending initiative.”

Partisan President Obama actually had the temerity to accuse Senate Republicans of damaging economic growth by “holding this bill hostage.” The man who impedes everything from individual freedom to economic recovery dramatically uttered the scripted slogan: “Drop the blockade.”

Soberly droning on, uttering meaningless poppycock, Obama continued reading off the teleprompter.  The president’s rhetoric included references to small businesses, middle class tax cuts, job creation and economic growth. As usual, in a five-minute statement Obama managed to fit in incendiary lingo like “partisan minorities” and “political games.”

Towards the end, the sun must have been in Obama’s eyes because the President stumbled over words like “effort,” correcting it to “attack.” Before turning and walking away, the smooth talker slipped up and blurted out the very apropos “silver spoon” instead of “silver bullet.”

A few hours after the technically-challenged economic encouragement/blame-Bush undertaking, the Dow plummeted 140 points, proving the point that, like everything Barack does, the ready-to-wreak-havoc Rose Garden declaration was just another in a long list of “smashing” Obama successes.

Polluted Presidential Pond

Originally posted at American Thinker Blog

The first family arrived on Martha’s Vineyard fully intending to avail themselves of the beach, the links and unlimited frosty licks.

According to White House spokesperson Bill Burton, it appears the President plans to have a working vacation: working out daily and working “on his swing at Mink Meadows golf club.” Burton elaborated: “There will be some hiking, some time at the beach” and, Lord knows, “some time at the ice cream store — all the sort of things you do when you’re at Martha’s Vineyard. You enjoy the people and the good food.”

Obama, who is someone used to always getting his own way, might be shocked to find out that “the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.”  It seems the Obama beachcombers are about to get waylaid, because “portions of Tisbury Great Pond, the salt-water lagoon fronting the first family’s vacation estate Blue Heron Farm, were closed earlier this week due to high levels of enterococci, an indicator that the water is contaminated with fecal coliform bacteria.”

“More than 200 Massachusetts beaches have been closed due to high bacteria readings this summer. The high counts are usually caused by sewage or storm water overflow but could also be caused by domestic or farm animals and wildlife.”

What a letdown, especially since the Blue Heron Farm, a lavish $20 million, 28.5-acre compound in Chilmark, has gone up from $35,000 a week last year to a still-economical $50,000 a week this year. An interesting point of trivia about Chilmark: the Martha’s Vineyard enclave was named the most expensive small town in all of America by Business Week back in 2007.  Chilmark can now add “most expensive septic tank” to its list of distinguishing features.

The addition of bacteria to the salt-water pond bordering the Obama temporary homestead may not pose a problem for the President.  It’s likely that Obama built up resistance with the gutsy plunge he took in the Gulf when vacationing in Florida.  One-dunk-Barry broadcast the following Florida public service message to America: Despite the “rash of bacteria-induced beach closings,” it’s still safe to swim in “oil spill-plagued areas.”

On the other hand, it would be best if Michelle steered clear of the putrid pool.  The first lady is more accustomed to the clear water of the Mediterranean in Marbella.  She won’t be taking a dainty dip in a pond that failed water-quality testing because “high levels of enterococci can cause skin irritation, vomiting or diarrhea in swimmers.” Itchy skin, queasiness, and an ailment Americans should only have to endure south of the border are pesky physical maladies that could force the Obama family to do the unthinkable and limit ice cream consumption for a few days.

When speaking about the presidential pond crisis, West Tisbury health agent John Powers did not express an opinion as to whether setting up a canvas hut on the Obamas’ private beach would pose a health hazard to the First Lady.

Powers also refused to commit as to whether presidential staff should resign themselves to letting the air out of the swimmies and Obama-logo water tubes. Remaining ambiguous, Powers maintained only that, “It’s not my job to recommend or not recommend whether or not to go in the water…I just get the numbers and take the appropriate action.”

When another town official was asked “whether or not it was safe for the prez to take a dip in the pond,” this particular gentleman was a “little more informative.” The longtime Martha’s Vineyard resident, who requested anonymity, openly joked, “Depends on whether or not he likes to swim in poop.”

Was that a joke or an understatement?  It should be obvious to the casual Vineyard observer that the President is quite accustomed to swimming in poop, considering that Chicago and Washington DC are the two towns he likes to call home.

“On Martha’s Vineyard, West Tisbury wasn’t the only town plagued by beach closings. Swimming was banned on four popular beaches …due to high bacteria counts,” but were “reopened yesterday after re-testing.” However, in Chilmark, where the Obamas are staying, “the pond at Lucy Vincent Beach had bacteria readings more than double the acceptable levels,” which could be an indictment against the presidential pond on Blue Heron Farm.

Although not mentioned thus far, the more likely source of contamination could be runoff from the famous Kennedy Compound.   History tells us the Kennedys have been guilty of polluting a pond or two in the past, so why not now?  After all is said and done, the Obama Chilmark vacation, while problematic, may just be suffering the cumulative effects of choosing a vacation spot 50 miles south of Hyannisport.

Making their way to ‘Mad Martha’s

Fresh off a 26-hour Florida retreat, President Obama and well-rested jetsetter wife Michelle and daughters Sasha and Malia left for 11 days at Blue Heron Farm in Chilmark on Martha’s Vineyard.

This year the Obamas have decided to go low-key. As jobless claims rose to a nine-month high the President and First Lady, being acutely sensitive to the economic reality Americans grapple with daily, felt it fitting to tone down vacation costs. So instead of spending two weeks at a tony spot like Nygard Cay Beach Resort for $30,000 a day, the couple chose the empathetic route and rented the Blue Heron Farm again for the 11-day price of $30-35,000.

While away, the President is expected to work out as well as don fashionable Bermudas and saddle shoes to work “on his swing at Mink Meadows golf club.” White House spokesperson Bill Burton said, “There will be some hiking, some time at the beach” and Lord knows, “some time at the ice cream store – all the sort of things you do when you’re at Martha’s Vineyard. You enjoy the people and the good food.”

Sitting home on a rickety beach chair, in front of a noisy fan, grilling hotdogs on a makeshift grill, grateful Americans, across the fruited plain, want to wish the Obamas a lovely, restful time. In fact, two helpful suggestions for America’s very own Martha’s Vineyard vacationers are definitely in order.

Biking aficionados would be remiss if the bike trail at “historic” Chappaquiddick was overlooked as a pedal-around site. However, the first suggestion comes with a warning: Barry and the girls should be aware that things do get a bit dicey along Poucha Pond, “a body of water that extends from famous Dike Bridge.” The first family should be careful making the famous Teddy-turn, so as not to end up in a “marshy pond” that the late Senator knew full well “doesn’t appeal to bathers.”

By now all America is well aware that when it comes to staking out ice cream, the Obamas need no direction. Last year, Dad bought the girls frozen creamery at Alley’s General Store. So it is fitting in light of the country’s general mood that as a second suggestion the President should check out “Mad Martha’s.” The mad menu at Martha’s includes: “Pig’s Delight,” which is traditionally ordered with an “oink.” The “Pig’s Delight,” is a12-scoop-frozen-oink-fest that can handle a crowd, as well as feed a family of four who really, really love ice cream.

Barack Obama landed in the affluent playground of Martha’s Vineyard as the unemployment line swelled to record lengths. Yet hope prevails that this year the POTUS will be spared ill-timed deaths and inconvenient crises similar to those that last summer beckoned America’s vacationing President away from the pressing business of whiling away the time and perfecting his golf swing.

Michelle and Sasha go to Spain – American Thinker – August 5, 2010

Originally posted at American Thinker blog

Greeted by a large red, white and blue banner, Michelle Obama landed safely in España. The First Lady and an entourage including daughter Sasha and three dozen of Michelle’s closest and most intimate friends were warmly welcomed on the Iberian Peninsula for “a private, mother-daughter trip.”

Notwithstanding the 5-star rating, the Villa Padierna is a peculiar choice for a mother/daughter moment as it is “often associated with reality TV and gangsters.”  Regardless, Michelle should feel right at home in a “millionaire’s playground,” internationally recognized as one of the world’s top 30 hotels.

Spain has been gracious toward the private mother-daughter-plus-40-people group, despite the U.S. State Department advising travelers that “racist prejudices could lead to the arrest of Afro-Americans who travel to Spain.”  If taken on face value it wouldn’t have posed a problem.  Michelle sports a bob, not an “afro,” thus the First Lady was never in danger of being targeted for racial profiling.

The controversial warning was issued because “two US government employees, both of them African-American” were detained “for no apparent reason” by Spanish police last year. The State Department failed to disclose whether Charlie Rangel and Maxine Waters were vacationing, albeit separately, in Marbella around the time of the incident.

Just prior to AF2 touching down at the Malaga Airport, the U.S. State Department pulled the Spanish racial-profiling warning.  It was quick thinking that spared Obama the heartache of having his wife possibly held over in Spain for an extended period of time.

The Spaniards have been so accommodating that “250 Spanish officers and military personal…[including]…police divers, bomb disposal experts and dog handlers” will be protecting Obama family and friends.  The Spanish security force will join 70 Secret Service agents, some of whom will be dressed in street clothes, mingling with sightseers.

“Mrs. Obama and her daughter are also expected to visit Spain’s King Juan Carlos and Queen Sofia at their summer palace on the island of Majorca,” which would likely be considered official business.

Either way, this private mother-daughter getaway stands to put a big dent in the President’s Martha’s Vineyard vacation budget.  Lucky for Barry the First Lady decided to “officially” visit the King and Queen.  A ten minute courtesy call ensures American taxpayers foot the bill.

Michelle’s four-day jaunt includes reserving 60 rooms in a 129-room hotel whose accommodations start at $333.00 and go up to $6502.00 per night. If Shelley decides to spare no expense to entertain nine year-old Sasha, the Villa Padierna hotel bill could be upwards of $1 million dollars or more.

Yet exorbitant expenditures are justified for an American dignitary of Michelle Obama’s stature, especially if palace-dwellers Juan and Sofia decide to drop by and pay Michelle and friends a reciprocal visit.

And so it goes. During the summer of 2010, while Americans sweated their next paycheck, Michelle and Sasha bonded on a multimillion-dollar trip to Spain. As for the State Department, rather than ditch the travel advisory sign maybe the government could save tax dollars for Michelle’s next expedition by crossing out the words “Afro-Americans” and “Spain” and penciling in “Mexicans” and “Arizona.”

%d bloggers like this: