Tag Archives: jokes

DISGUSTING: From Planned Parenthood To Kathy Griffin — Are Decapitated Heads Now Fodder for Jokes?

Originally posted at CLASH Daily

Could it be that all the beheading ISIS does is merely the group’s attempt to inject laughter into a dour world? To prove that point, recently, on a three-minute Center for Medical Progress video, a Planned Parenthood of Michigan medical director flippantly said that pro-choice proponents should just admit that abortion is murder.

Now, how funny is that?

Medical director, Lisa Harris not only has the courage of her convictions, much like Jihadi Johnand youthful Mexican assassin, El Ponchis, this is a woman with a great sense of humor.

For her opening monolog, Harris warmed up the crowd by recommending that the best way to deal with those who oppose abortion is to make light of the violence. On the video, Harris joked around saying, “Let’s just give them all the violence. It’s a person. It’s killing. Let’s just give them all that.”

Yes, lets!

Then, further along in her slapstick routine, Harris kidded about trying to pull the severed head of an aborted baby out of its mother’s womb. Inserting levity into the abortion process, Harris jested about “The heads that get stuck that we can’t get out…[and] the hemorrhages that we manage.”

In other words, at Planned Parenthood amputated heads and profuse bleeding are fodder for laughing it up? Which proves, once again, that ISIS, abortion advocates, and now pro-choice comedians, are all on the same page when it comes to severed heads.

Take, for instance, irreverent comedian, Kathy Griffin.

In addition to telling Jesus to “suck it”, and saying that her Emmy is her God, Kathy appeared in a pro-abortion video with Cher to support the re-election of hilariously-witty-abortion-proponent Barack Obama. Then, in the height of the oh-so-funny #shoutyourabortion craze, Kathy tweeted approbations to a woman who had the courage to brag about relegating her offspring to a red biohazard bag.

More recently Kathy, who is all about the hilarity of headless corpses, posed for an amusing “Love Trumps Hate” photo with edgy photographer Tyler Shields. In her outstretched arm, the knee-slapping, buttoned-up Kathy held what looked like Donald Trump’s decapitated blood-soaked head.

Griffin’s homage to ISIS included dampening Trump’s blond hair with blood in a color that matched her own carrot-top red. The picture of Kathy is so uproariously funny it is sure to have Griffin-loving/Trump-hating fans absolutely rolling in the aisles.

During the photo shoot it is purported Griffin told Tyler that after the humorous assassination threat against a sitting president was released, to avoid prison, the comedy team might need to move to Mexico, where rib-tickling things like severing heads is a national past time.

And so, despite Kathy Griffin’s hollow apology where she blamed poor judgment on being a comic in search of good material, it’s final; ISIS, Planned Parenthood, and pro-choice comedians all think beheading is giggle-worthy.

With that in mind, although Americans are usually up for a good joke, maybe there is cause for some concern. After all, if ISIS laughs about removing heads for religion reasons, Planned Parenthood for convenience sake, and liberal comedians on behalf of politics, how long will it be before the violent Trump resistance has a good belly laugh at the thought of decapitating anybody who disagrees with them?

BARACK OBAMA’S JOKE TIME YIPEE! The Unemployed Have Healthcare

Barack Obama#WOriginally posted at CLASH Daily

At the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, once again “aging socialist Muslim” Barack Obama dipped his toe into the stand-up comedy pool. The problem is that what he had to say was more sad than funny.

At the podium, where he was supposed to be poking fun at himself aided by a cache of really bad jokes, Obama endeavored to justify his failed policies (hardy-har-har) and humiliate his critics.

At one point in his largely vindictive routine the president had this to say:

The fact is, though, at this point, my legacy is finally beginning to take shape. The economy is getting better. Nine in ten Americans now have health coverage. [Applause.] Today, thanks to Obamacare, you no longer have to worry about losing your insurance if you lose your job. You’re welcome, Senate Democrats. [Laughter and applause.]

“If?” Shouldn’t it be more like “since you lost your job,” or “when you lose your job?”
Either way, there are many problems with the president’s statement, the most glaring of which is Obama’s lack of elaboration on the “you no longer have to worry about losing your insurance if you lose your job” comment.

Although the comedically-challenged Obama is anything but amusing, what’s really not amusing is the cold hard truth that approximately 92 million, count ’em, 92 million, or half of America’s working-age population, may have Obama’s shoddy health insurance but are also not working.

In other words, how big of a laugh would Obama have gotten if, instead of pumping up his pathetic legacy, he decided to mention that in 2014, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) – wait, wait, this is really hilarious – 19.9% of the 81 million families in America, or 16 million family units, had no one working?

It could have gone something like this: “I’m proud to say that, thanks to me, half of all working-age Americans, although hopelessly and possibly permanently unemployed, have all the time in the world to apply for Obamacare.”

Talk about rip-snortingly funny.

The data on unemployed families comes to us through the Census Bureau’s Current Population Survey of the civilian non-institutional population.

Although, based on what’s happening in Ferguson and Baltimore, clearly some of those counted among the unemployed belong either in jail or in an insane asylum, census numbers include people 16 and older who are not on active duty in the military or in an institution such as a prison, nursing home, or mental hospital.

Looters and lunatics aside, when looking for stuff to tickle the funny bone of sycophant celebrities and fawning journalists, maybe instead of mocking Dick Cheney and FOX News and trying desperately to convince America he’s not a socialist Muslim, Obama the Joke Teller could have been more upfront. But he wasn’t.

And that’s understandable, because at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner love fest, Barack Obama was probably so excited about telling jokes and having “anger translator” Keegan-Michael Keys, aka “Luther,” verbalize what is really seething below the surface of his otherwise calm demeanor that he forgot to mention that in 1 out of 5 American families no one is working.

For us it’s different. According to William Shakespeare’s King Lear, “In jest, there is truth,” so how about we do what the president didn’t do and provide a witty visual?

For those who have problems grasping numbers:  16,000,000 American families amount to 879 Madison Square Gardens filled to capacity with one representative from each family unit. Of the staggering 92 million people in America who are currently not in the workforce, a large number of jobless people clearly belong to some of the 16 million families where not one person in the household is employed.

With that visual in mind, what really would have been comical is if instead of sharing what he perceives to be a superb legacy, the president ’fessed up, mixed a little truth in with his jest and said, “Thanks to me, Obama-unemployment-induced bleeding ulcers, heart attacks, strokes and migraine headaches are now fully covered by Obamacare!”

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