Tag Archives: INVESCO Field

Two Rotten Obama Gardens


Originally posted at The Blacksphere

When Michelle Obama’s Kitchen Garden came on the scene in the fall of 2009, it did so with almost as much fanfare as the soaring 2008 acceptance speech Barack Obama delivered while positioned between two Styrofoam Greek columns at INVESCO Field.

Less than a year after leaving the mean streets of Chicago and setting up shop at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Mrs. Obama had the South Lawn rototilled, turned over the soil shod in her $500 Tory Burch gardening boots. A cacophony of vegetables were planted, and the first lady’s Kitchen Garden became the launching pad for her “Let’s Move!” healthy-eating initiative.

Now, supposedly because of the government shutdown, the first lady’s once-lush 1,500 square-foot veggie patch is filled with rotting organic produce. Weeds are taking over and vine vegetables are decomposing on the ground.

Worse yet, word is out that even mushrooms, which are fungi (how appropriate), are populating the place.  Un-raked leaves blanket the beds, and squirrels and foxes freely feast on a cornucopia of nasty vegetables.

The reason for the White House garden dilemma is that the National Park Service horticulturists are on “minimal maintenance.”  Therefore, the guys who service the first lady’s garden are not trimming, harvesting, weeding, raking, or mowing the grass.

Based on the ballyhoo that trumpeted Michelle Obama’s affinity for gardening, one would think the first lady would slip on her designer gardening attire and head out to tidy up her beloved ‘victory’ garden and attempt to rescue her French fingerlings.

Not that anyone thought Mrs. Obama was out back-hoeing and tilling. But she has become a spokesperson for gardening at the White House and even wrote a book “American Grown: The Story of the White House Kitchen Garden and Gardens Across America.” It’s kind of shocking that the woman America witnessed crawling around in an arugula patch would allow her orchard to deteriorate for lack of anyone to pick the papayas off her papaya tree.

Despite Michelle’s putrid papayas, the first lady’s organic plantation has ironically assumed a new role.  Instead of producing bushels of okra, lemongrass, and sweet potatoes, the South Lawn garden has “fundamentally transformed” into a tangible teaching tool.

What started out as a garden for Michelle Obama to instruct America about the value of planting and eating vegetables has now become a symbol of the political environment her husband has created.

Rotten tomatoes and wildflowers growing in- and outside raised beds aside, the truth is that Michelle’s highly touted Kitchen Garden mirrors the condition of a weed-laden presidency that for five years has produced nothing but rotten fruit overrun by hungry foragers.


Two Sides of a Vanity Coin

Originally posted at American Thinker

It’s both pathetic and eye-opening to see a spectacular legend sitting on the floor wrapped in a blanket, reviewing fuzzy images of himself on TV.  In recently released images, a pre-mortem Osama bin Laden, remote in hand, looks like a homeless guy in a squalid shelter, not a terrorist mastermind planning and driving tactical decisions from a Pakistani command and control center.

The compound in Pakistan where al Qaeda’s operational chief was killed by US Navy SEALs delivered “the largest trove of intelligence ever obtained from a senior terrorist leader.”  From the captured cache officials released five very enlightening “video clips of bin Laden taken during the raid, most of them showing the al Qaeda leader, his beard dyed black, evidently rehearsing the videotaped speeches he occasionally distributed to his followers.”

 The videos expose Osama bin Laden’s nefarious plans, half-truths, and pre-recorded messages, which “condemn[ed] US policy and denigrat[ed] capitalism.”  As an added bonus, the video also revealed evidence of bin Laden’s vain personality quirks.  One of the terrorist mastermind’s idiosyncrasies appeared to be a disproportionate obsession with personal image, which is a trait eerily similar to his foe and ultimate deliverer of justice – a guy with a similar name who “jealously guards his [own] image” while reading off a Teleprompter.

No sane person would argue that the most significant benefit from the confiscated videotape is intelligence.  However, an unexpected profit gained from the collection is insight into a President who, like Osama, somehow morphed into a mythical being but whom, upon closer inspection, is slowly turning out to be nothing more than mortal flesh.

Both Osama and his rhyming foe Obama have been buoyed along with religious fervor by cult-like followings. In both cases, the foundation upon which the adversary’s iconic status has been built is based on philosophical ideas, alleged oratory skill, and reputations cultivated by fictional imagery rather than tangible reality.

Although Barack’s popularity was gained for reasons different from the homicidal activities that catapulted bin Laden to the height of notoriety, as it turns out the guy who finally gave the thumbs-up to kill the al Qaeda mastermind also happens to be equally concerned with physical appearance and public perception.

A larger-than-life phantom up until the very end, Osama evoked worldwide fear; yet in one segment of the confiscated videos he is seen to be a feeble, gray-bearded, vulnerable old man, subject to the cold, holed up in a disheveled room, wiling away the time by watching videos starring himself.

One official said: “The videos make clear that bin Laden remained active in al Qaeda’s terrorist propaganda operations, especially in shaping his own image. It is improbable that this kind of footage would be anywhere but with bin Laden… [who]… jealously guarded his image.” The only thing missing was a couple of Greek columns.

Nevertheless, it’s obvious that President Barack Obama would never be caught sitting on the floor of an untidy room, shivering beneath a blanket and watching a CRT television set featuring reruns of his INVESCO Field speech.  However, 7,000 miles away from Pakistan in Washington DC, in Barack’s world he makes certain to be tightly scripted and avoids media disasters through fastidious styling and assistance from a high tech Teleprompter.

Osama’s surprising obsession with how he looked was showcased on the tape when the fearsome commander of worldwide terror’s scruffy beard showed up gray in one shot and black in another.  The same sort of self-consciousness would be on evident on a time-lapse display of Barack’s short-cropped hair change from Monday morning black to Friday afternoon salt-and-pepper. Barack Obama’s ongoing albeit subtle weekly transformation helps the world better understand the sort of Narcissistic obsession that gripped the al Qaeda leader who, when not planning to blow up the world, was carefully dying his beard.

Terrorist tendencies aside, concern for outward appearance and public image takes up residence in a certain type of person, and both Osama and Obama embody the trait. So, after 10 long years, Osama bin Laden, a man who practiced speeches, loved watching videos of himself, and whose chest hair sometimes didn’t match his chin hair, in an ironic turn of events, was justly relegated to the annals of history by a equally big-headed nemesis decked out in designer duds.

Even still, the world is well aware that Barack Obama adheres to diametrically opposed philosophical goals from his now-deceased archenemy from Abbottabad. Yet who would have thought bin Laden, living in compounds and caves among goats, camels and fellow terrorists, actually rivaled Barry in the narcissism department?

 In the area of egotistical conceit, the duo’s pervasive self-absorption extends far beyond ideology and political leaning, because both men share a surprising character trait: prior to bin Laden’s assassination, rivals Osama and Obama were like two sides of a vanity coin.

Cartoon by Richard Terrell of Terrell Aftermath

Oprah’s ‘Shift in Consciousness’

The woman was so overtaken with INVESCO Field-Obama-acceptance-speech emotion she cried her false eyelashes off. Oprah Winfrey, Barack’s most famous advocate, said Obama’s words were both “transcendent” and “transformational.” During the campaign, the second biggest “O” prayed in the “deepest part” of her “being that America [would] rise to [the] moment” and elect the biggest “O.”

Television tycoon Oprah Gail Winfrey conquered poverty and a “troubled youth” to become the most influential woman in media. She is an Oscar-nominated actress, author, humanitarian, and billionaire, as well as a one-woman charitable organization and Life Time Achievement Emmy winner. Yet despite all of her personal accomplishments, on the night of candidate Obama’s nomination speech, Winfrey confessed: “Obama’s presidential race and quick rise in the Democratic Party was the most powerful thing [she’d] ever experienced.” which doesn’t say much for Stedman, best friend Gayle, or the casts of the Color Purple and Beloved.

In fact, after Obama was elected, Oprah hosted a post-election special wearing a “Hope Won” T-shirt and wildly waving an American flag, holding up a newspaper with Barry’s picture on the front page while rowdily chanting “Mr. President!” Winfrey whooped it up and told her audience that if Obama lost, “Trust me… we’d be doing the show today from Northwestern Hospital with a drip.”

Oprah remains popular.  However, since endorsing Obama her high regard and huge viewership has steadily eroded. The Queen of Daytime TV’s foray onto the political stump has cost her a ton of fans. In light of Obama’s present standing in the polls, Oprah may be able to remediate the situation with a new T-shirt that says: “Hope Won, but please don’t hold it against me.”

According to Pew Research, Obama is “struggling with white voters.” More surprising is his “approval ratings among black voters plummet[ing] … to their lowest levels ever.” Gallup also found that “support [for Obama] among Hispanics took a tumble in the same period.”

At the same time as Obama’s quick descent from his lofty perch of glory, Oprah is branching out to “her own cable channel called OWN” and a source said she has been “struggling to find an audience,” and “fighting every day” to get viewers to tune in.

Therefore, after Barack announced his 2012 reelection campaign, Oprah decided it may be in her OWN best interest to avoid recreating her hysterical 2008 Tom Cruise-jumping-on-the-couch, Barack-Obama-for-President moment.

Which means for Oprah’s May 25th final show, a disappointed audience may not find a 2O12bama license plate frame in the complimentary gift bag.

Wasn’t it just yesterday that Oprah swooned in full-fledged Obama ecstasy?  Well this time around, growing a new audience for her joint venture with Discovery Communications must take precedence over wearing a “Yes we can” sombrero on air in honor of an increasingly out-of-favor president, because while it’s certain Winfrey will support Obama again, she’s decided to do so in an undisclosed location.

A source explained: “Helping a friend keep the most important job in the world is great,” but ensuring that her network endeavor “thrives is now [Oprah’s] priority.” The current “shift of consciousness” Ms. Winfrey now strives for and the “most powerful thing” the $2.7 billion dollar media mogul looks forward to experiencing includes growing a cable channel, keeping her false eyelashes firmly in place and preventing Barack Obama from single-handedly making her Oprah Winfrey Network venture the first thing she attempts that doesn’t succeed.

Barack’s ‘Idiot Board’

Originally posted at American Thinker blog

Don’t be surprised if Barack Obama challenges Walter Mondale to a Hamilton/Burr-style duel.  Former Vice President Mondale insulted two of the President’s most cherished possessions: the teleprompter, as well as Barack’s esteemed personhood.

Walter Mondale called teleprompters “idiot boards,” which offended defenseless teleprompters everywhere. Moreover, the twofold insult implied that idiots rely on “idiot boards,” an affront applicable to a certain President who relies heavily on electronic devices when speechifying.

Idiot is defined as: “foolish or stupid person. A person … having a mental age below three years and generally being unable to learn connected speech or guard against common dangers.”  If a teleprompter is a board for idiots, was Mr. Mondale implying Barack Obama is an “idiot?”

The elderly Walter isn’t the only one noticing Barry’s inability to speak without hauling along a scrolling security blanket. The President’s most ardent goose bump-riddled fans are also beginning to disparage Obama’s electronic facade. Chris “thrill going up my leg” Matthews, who just two years ago swooned every time Obama spoke, sounded like a jealous lover discussing the Obama teleprompter addiction:

You know sometimes I really support the President on a lot of his views, in fact all of them but I have to tell you, if he doesn’t get rid of that damn teleprompter. It’s like an eye-test, he’s just reading words now, it’s separating him from us. You go to a meeting with him I’m told at the White House, he hauls out the damn teleprompter and he reads it to them, why even bring people into the room, just have the teleprompter… I sense it’s getting in between him and us.

Unlike Chris Matthews’ unapologetic denigration, Walter Mondale attempted to tone down the “idiot” observation by clarifying for CNN’s Wolf Blitzer: “I think he — he’s very bright — as a matter of fact, brilliant. And I think he tends to — and he uses these idiot boards to read speeches on television and I think he loses the connection that he needs emotionally with American voters.”

How exactly does Walter Mondale assess the intellectual acumen of a person who rarely utters a word without a script?

As far as the empathy issue goes, Barack’s odd habit of looking side to side may have worked in front of 76,000 INVESCO Field sycophants.  However, at a small press conference consisting of 30 some-odd reporters, incessantly pivoting from right to left causes one to resemble a wooden bobble head doll.

During the CNN interview, Mondale intimated that Barack was an idiot with an empathy deficit.  In response, Wolf Blitzer asked the former VP to expound on why he thought Obama lacked emotional connection with the American people.   Beholden to root around for another “he’s very bright” compliment to moderate his short-on-rapport critique, the polite Mondale replied, “I’ve seen places where he’s done it. The Milwaukee speech, I thought was terrific. I think some of these backyard events are terrific.

It wasn’t purposeful, but Walter’s comments implied Barry is self-assured only when stirring up audiences in labor union T-shirts and requesting chili pepper doggy bags, but wavers if addressing sixth grade students.

According to Walter Mondale, Barack is a brilliant idiot, outstanding at extending sympathy, but only when sipping sweet tea in backyard focus groups.  As a result, Obama’s electronic Siamese twin has been saddled with the undue burden of having to come up with a brilliantly empathetic retort to Mondale’s insightful assessment of an unfeeling man, unable to express inner conviction without the direct assistance of an “idiot board.”

INVESCO II Healthcare Summit

President Obama has scheduled a health care summit for later this month. The purpose? To offer the public promised transparency after refusal to do so until pesky Scott Brown put the kibosh on the Democratic health care overthrow.

Obama desires to, “resolve remaining differences between the House and Senate versions of their own legislation in advance of the meeting.”  Which translated means Obama, through persuasive rhetoric, will attempt to convince “uncooperative” Republicans to accept a “final bill” they were supposedly called there to discuss.

Obama will host a “Lights, camera action” thrashing out of a bill, but the whole scenario will lack genuine, productive debate.  Sort of like Obama employing fruitless tea and crumpet negotiation techniques to convince Mahmoud Ahmadinejad relinquish the march toward nuclear weapons.

Beforehand Barry, Harry and Nancy will decide what and how it’s going to go.  The trio will shuffle the Senate and Congressional bill like a deck of cards into an unbending, final version.  Then a transparent Obama will summon Republicans to Summit House, offer them the limited choice of accepting what has already been decided upon, or be portrayed as “uncooperative” and lacking concern for the struggles of the American people.

Collaborative Democrats contend, “Starting from scratch is not an option.”  Republicans [thank God] refuse to budge because they say they, the House and Senate Democratic bill is not a launching off point because both bills include tax increases, which economically would be a disastrous thing to do.

While the master of Greek column special effects positions himself as being open to discussion.  The real goal will be to present a conciliatory President strapped with the burden of immature politicians.  The hope is to again “turn the tide” and convince the public obstinate Republicans need to, “participate like mature adults, and not just say ‘no’ to everything.”

The Summit holds zero promise of compromise based on the numerous proposals Republican’s have presented to the health care debate, all have which have been ignored. Reading the teleprompter as Republicans wave varying proposals in his face Obama looks right and left purposely ignoring suggestions like those offered by Jim DeMint.

Obama discounts the smart kid in the first row raising his hand to answer every question and than penalizes the child for lacking class participation.

At the Republican retreat a frustrated Rep. Tom Price (R-GA) challenged the President saying, “Mr. President, multiple times from your administration there have come statements that Republicans have no ideas and no solutions, in spite of the fact that we’ve offered, as demonstrated today, positive solutions to all of the challenges we face.”  Security, oh security could you see this guy to the door please?

The Summit ruse has the potential to be nothing more than “political theatre” with Obama luring Republicans into a trap.  Once at Blair House Obama will present a bad and worse finalized health care bill. Republicans will be asked to concur, as to whether America should be tied to the tracks in the path of an oncoming train, hurled over a cliff or immolated?  When Republicans refuse to accept any of the three a teary-eyed Obama can turn to the camera, amidst soaring violins, and confirm the opposing party uncaring contrarians and Democrats tireless workers on behalf of the American people.

One problem Obama may also be overlooking. The nation is tuned into Obama’s INVESCO field theatrics and are sick of smoke and mirror subterfuge that benefits only Barack and hurts the American people—let’s hope Obama’s wily Summit stunt backfires.

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