Originally posted at The Clash Daily
Taking to the podium at the White House Correspondents Dinner the president proved once again that he’s a laugh a minute. At first it was a little distracting because the president’s head, which of late has been a distinguished shade of gray, was suddenly all pepper and no salt.
Nonetheless, Barack Obama managed to tickle the funny bones of loyal Hollywood A-listers and a cadre of media hacks whose brown noses wrinkled with amusement as a tux-clad Barry did his stand-up comedy routine.
As a reminder of his appearance on “Between Two Ferns” with Zack Galifianakis where he attempted to place the burden of healthcare on the shoulders of younger Americans, the president commenced by requesting his aides bring out two fig leaves…er, I mean potted plants.
From there he diminished the seriousness of the horrendous mess he’s made this year by making light of things that in reality inspire lamentation, not laughter.
The president infused his humor with tidbits of truth, which was his smirky way of informing the nation that he doesn’t care that 47% of the country has buyer’s remorse, that he knows Obamacare is a complete fiasco, and that he despises every living, breathing Republican.
In other words, Obama used his hatred and incompetence as fodder for jokes, entertaining Hollywood and DC elites with sarcastic references to the struggles of very real people.
For instance, is it funny that millions of Americans are suffering as a result of the unaffordable, inaccessible Affordable Care Act? Apparently President Obama thinks so, because after only one person clapped when he said “we rolled out healthcare.gov” (an obvious prompt for applause), he moved right along to “On the plus side, they did turn the launch of healthcare.gov into the launch of one of the year’s biggest movies.”
And Obama didn’t limit the tasteless jokes to Obamacare; he also brought up the missing Malaysian flight, saying “The lengths we have to go to get CNN coverage these days. I think they’re still searching for their table.”
The family of IBM Executive Phil Wood, one of three Americans onboard the missing Malaysia Flight 370, probably found the president’s gallows humor downright hilarious.
After unwittingly revealing how he’s dealt with Benghazi by saying that “In 2008 my slogan was, ‘Yes We Can.’ In 2013 my slogan was, ‘Control-Alt-Delete,’” Barack ‘it takes one to know one’ Obama described headliner Joel McHale’s character on Community as a “preening, self-obsessed narcissist[s]” (Ahem).
Despite a 41% approval rating, Obama proceeded to rib MSNBC, the left-wing cable news network whose miniscule ratings are directly related to their fawning love affair with the guy pointing out that they have no viewers.
Next came the knock-knock jokes. First, Obama knocked the Fox and Friends morning hosts, tied Fox News to the Koch brothers, and topped off those knee-slappers by insinuating that “fair and balanced” is code for “shadowy right-wing organization.”
Then the president used the Boston Marathon as an entrée to some birther-mocking, getting cheap laughs and applause by insulting those who remain suspicious of the man who, prior to having presidential aspirations, openly claimed he was Kenyan born.
Right before saying, “As a general rule, things don’t end well if the sentence starts, ‘Let me tell you something I know about the Negro,’” the president linked Rand Paul with Clive Bundy, the Nevada rancher who made the racist remark. Speaking of Rand Paul, the Kentucky senator must really get under Obama’s skin, because the president painted Paul as paranoid for pointing out that government listening in on Americans’ cell phone calls disrespects privacy rights.
Creative comic that he is, Obama jabbed at Eric Cantor by making Americans’ suffering as a result of an abysmal economy the butt of jokes. Then, after lighting upon the Republican war on women, Obama dived right into ridiculing John Boehner’s oddly-shaded tan with a reference to the hit show Orange is the New Black.
To quote late comedian Jackie Gleason, “Har har hardy har har!”
Ted Cruz, Chris Christie, George W. Bush, Rick Perry, Pat Buchanan, and Rudy Giuliani predictably made it onto Obama’s WHCD most-hateful zingers list. Mr. Mom Jeans called Putin a “conservative darling,” and even brought up Sean Hannity and Mike Huckabee’s fascination with Putin’s bare chest.
Next the president kidded that Obamacare could revive Mitch McConnell’s barely audible pulse. Then Barack Obama, citizen of the world, missed a perfect opportunity to leave the open-borders crowd rolling in the aisles with a joke about MERS arriving in America’s heartland.
Besides MERS and antibiotic-resistant TB, there was certainly a laugh waiting to be had on the backs of a million Americans with cancer being thrown off their health insurance. Not to mention forcing nuns to buy policies that provide free birth control and abortion. Zing!
Barack ‘D.L. Hughley’ Obama brought up Hillary ducking a flying shoe. Yuck, yuck. That should have been the president’s “What difference, at this point, does it make” segue into a list of Benghazi-themed witticisms.
Hey, did you hear the one about the murdered American ambassador who waited for hours for help that never came?
America’s ‘flexible’ president humbly admitted that he believes Republicans refusing to extend unemployment “have a point,” confessing, “If you want to get paid while not working, you should have to run for Congress just like everybody else,” which met with much hilarity and applause.
The “getting paid while not working” remark could have presented a smooth transition into a little self-deprecating humor with some quips about $40 million in travel expenses for vacations and golf outings, Michelle’s jet-setting lifestyle and taste for expensive vodka, and Granny Robinson berating the help in the $8,400-a-night hotel suite in China.
In the world of standup, that’s pure comedy gold!
In the end, dragging out the unfunny but tech-savvy Kathleen Sebelius for her big cameo consumed valuable comedy time, which unfortunately cut into Obama’s plan to bring down the house with a perfectly-timed punchline about bringing down country.