Jeannie-ology

The First Lady is continually issuing shrill compliance edicts based on her ideological view of a King Obama ruled America. Every time she steps out in a pair of metallic ballet flats she reveals herself more-and-more to be a priggish elitist with insensitive aristocratic tendencies. While supporting stringent decrees for the have not’s, deep within the palace walls the Royal Lady avails herself to five-star treatment and licks the fat from pheasant on the glass with full abandon. Though very popular, many astute Americans are not fooled by the First Lady’s behavior. “It is true that you may fool all the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all the time; but you can’t fool all of the people all the time.”

It is on the record that Michelle Obama did make a “Let them eat cake statement, matter-of-factly blurting out to the Corporate Voices for Working Families that, “Everyone should have a chief of staff and a set of personal assistants.” She could have at least included a personal chef, butler and handmaiden to the list of national needs. And who better than Barack to make it happen? Just think about how that sort of entitlement would sure up his voting bloc. In the 2009 fiscal year budget a $3.4 trillion dollar spending plan could certainly support a domestic service initiative and it would generate the jobs the $800 billion stimulus package guaranteed but has yet to produce.

Recently, on a Queen of Sensitivity tour, Michelle Obama, reached out to the underclass by volunteering precious photo shoot time to bag food for hungry children. Appropriately accessing her audience Michelle arrived casually shod in $540.00 dollar, suede and metallic pink Lanvin sneakers. The same pair sells for $565.00 at Barney’s. Through savvy shopping economy conscious, thrifty Michelle Obama saved $15.00, which she most certainly contributed to the Kraft macaroni and cheese donation cup at the pantry.

Environmentalists and PETA might have been offended by Michelle’s soup kitchen outreach. PETA by the suede on the sneakers and the Sierra Club over those plastic bags she enthusiastically overloaded with Hamburger Helper. Doesn’t she know Nordstrom’s carries the Envirosax? Not to worry, the Sierra Club disregarded Obama burning 9,000 gallons of fuel on Earth Day, so environmentally acute Michelle planting trees at the Kenilworth Aquatic Gardens, in a navy and emerald green ruche, $1000.00 Lanvin tank top, should quell the plastic and suede faux pas.

Since the campaign Michelle has been also working the fire and brimstone circuit evangelizing American’s to live up to the stringent statutes of the Gospel according to Barack

In an over- the-top piercing harangue Michelle alerted Barack cohorts that, “Barack will require his flock to work!” Michelle could not foresee that their hero would force the unemployment rate to its highest in 25 years. The Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget estimated that even with spending reductions Barry’s throw money from the balcony policy proposals, would add a net $428 billion to the deficit over four years. Michelle is correct, we will be required to strive like slaves day and night, because the deficit will quadruple to $1.75 trillion. Obama devotees and unbelievers alike are consigned, for generations to come, to hard time in collective diligence.

Another one of our esteemed first lady’s piercing public proclamations informed the “Land of the free” of “demands” to “shed their cynicism.” Michelle couldn’t mean the type of cynicism fostered by authoritarian politicians who establish one set of rules for the haves and another for the have not’s? As a first step toward eradicating public cynicism, the monarchy flew a pizza chef 860 miles from St. Louis, Missouri to Washington D.C. to make their favorite thin-crust pizza. The pizza extravaganza was an excellent opportunity to recap Michelle’s diktat that Americans are going to have to learn to “…give up a piece of their pie so that someone else can have more,” starting with the customers at π who were forced to go without pizza while Chris Sommers was rolling in dough over at the palace.

Michelle pressures Americans to, “Put out our division.” Aptly taking her own advise the Queen of Racial Healing did not fail to point out our nation’s blemishes at the Sojourner Truth statue unveiling at Emancipation Hall in the Capitol. She redirected the hot light toward similarities in much the same way Pastor Reverend Wright did during her twenty years in his church. Michelle shared her relief that, “Now many young boys and girls, like my own daughters, will come to Emancipation Hall and see the face of a woman who looks like them.”

Michelle and Sojourner are two of a kind. Michelle spoke of her own wrenching slave ancestry honoring Sojourner Truth as one who endured being “ whipped with “a bundle of rods, prepared in the ember.“ Since breaking ground on the Victory Garden the new save money on groceries gardener, Michelle Obama, could closely identify with the ex-slave who, “ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns…worked as much and ate as much as a man – when I could get it … borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery.” To honor Sojourner’s fashion statement white bonnet Michelle dressed in a $2,000.00 Sophie Theallet frock from the French designers black models only spring 2009 collection.

Michelle Obama’s clarion call also includes Americans “come out of isolation.” The globally minded citizen of the world, reminded attendees at the Time 100 gala that, “America’s future is intricately linked to the rest of the world, that the threats facing the global community know no borders.” At that same event , the always welcoming First Lady enforced patrician partition immediately following her beckoning America out of “isolation” speech, “The six scribes invited to sit for dinner were all told beforehand, “Do not speak to [Obama], she’s just here to relax.” Michelle exclusively huddled with good friend and billionaire Oprah.

Mrs. Obama never hesitates to point a long crooked finger at America suggesting that we need to refuse segregation. Since landing in the middle of an all-welcoming White House, Michelle Obama has yet to lead the way in tearing down barriers by admitting that her racial diatribe, Princeton thesis was far from accurate when it said, “…integration and/or assimilation into a White cultural and social structure” would force her to, “remain on the periphery of society.”

Michelle views herself as on the “periphery of society” because of her race? Yet, she hobnobs regularly with socialites, rubs elbows with celebrities and has a personal chef scramble her egg whites. As a minority First Lady of the “United” States of America, whose husband was elected to represent all citizens, does Michelle still feel that this nation views her as, “Black first and first lady second?” Because if she doesn’t, she has yet to express that sentiment.

Michelle has been strident when it comes to addressing “comfort zones,” zeroing in on unacceptable vestiges of ease. Yet, Michelle employs a full-time makeup artist to pluck her exceedingly overarched eyebrows and give her a “signature” look. Michelle is cover girl perfect whenever she crosses the moat on their crusade to ram home the need for Americans to “Move out of their comfort zones.” Next Wednesday evening, while a perfectly coifed Lady O, revs up the conga line, adorned in a Peter Soronen’s “twilight gown,” 90% of America will be getting comfy by safety pinning stretched out waistbands on ripped sweat pants.

In the come out of your comfort zone Obama White House, luxury is not a commodity to be skimped on.  Mrs. O beckons a spoiled America to divest themselves of comfort on behalf of much needed “hard change” while preparing to decorate with, “…antiques, gilded screens, white sofas, oriental rugs, four-poster beds, hand-blocked fabrics, chinoserie wallpapersa and a dark Japanese-inspired kitchen.”

When Michelle, gets done wiggling her toes in the Sultanabad carpet will she then decide what “comfort zone” loving, less than perfect Americans should do to “Push to be better?” After drafting our marching orders is she expecting exhausted Americans, drooling on their couches from pure exhaustion, to rise in submission and “engage” in a manner worthy of Michelle’s collective vision?

Mrs. Obama demands we work, while she gardens in Jimmy Choo’s. Michelle will make us put out our divisions, while she points out the color of children’s faces. Under duress, we’ll be forced out of isolation, while Michelle forbids to be addressed over dinner. Lady O is on a mission is to nudge us out of the tiny comfort zone we have in our weary lives, while she peruses silk swatches transforming the White House living quarters into a cozy English country cottage-like house.

“Barack will never allow you to go back to your lives as usual,” says a strident Michelle, which sounds a tad dictatorial. Someone needs to tell the First Lady that Americans resent being pushed around, especially by hypocritical, disingenuous, spoiled-brat, self-righteous, racially divisive radicals who exercise their authority by inflicting guilt trips on hard-working, well-meaning, country and freedom loving Americans.

High approval ratings Michelle isn’t fooling all of us. Her imperious, overbearing manner coupled together with a matter-of-fact dismissal of lavish trappings, while demanding austere denial and sacrifice from everyone else is hypocritical and being exposed at every charity event she shows up at donned in brazen haute couture. Lest Michelle forget, “Hypocrisy … may deceive the cleverest and most penetrating man, but the least wide-awake of children recognizes it, and is revolted by it, however ingeniously it may be disguised.”

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